You Know You're a Beijinger When ...

Tricia Demmers | May 17, 2012 10:00 am | 13 comments | 3618 reads

Have you ever thought about how much your home environment affects you? Minus the “go” mentality that every metropolis instills in a person, each city instills its own characteristics. New Yorkers have become known for their work hard/play hard attitude, Torontonians are thought of as hipsters, Parisiens are famous for their love of black coffee and dark chocolate. And so on and so forth.

So, what attributes has Beijing instilled in us? Are there certain behaviors that would clearly distinguish us from residents of other cities? Here's a list of qualities to help you figure out just how deeply Beijing has gotten under your skin.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you’re able to weave your way through a traffic jam on your bike like Ethan Hunt in Mission Impossible cruising in stealth mode – undetectable. The drivers hate you. And you couldn’t care less.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you saunter nonchalantly into a street of oncoming traffic even when the red hand is flashing.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... a regular stop for you is the fruit truck on the corner to grab a stick of pineapple or half a watermelon. You tell yourself that eating fruit daily will cancel out the pollution you’re constantly breathing in.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you often try to fit more than two people on a pedal bike. Your fantasy is that one day you can squeeze on four people. The best part: Nobody would give you a second look if you pulled it off.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you're disappointed that a new snack food does not come in green tea flavor.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... a typical evening is spent eating chuan'r and drinking Tsingtao with an assortment of Zambians, Russians, Brits, Syrians, Americans, Chinese and Koreans.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you know at some point it must end. And that’s that.

What other behaviors do you think mark us out as Beijingers? Feel free to add your contribution in the comments section below.

Photo: Clark Nielsen

Comments

New comments are displayed first.

Comments

simplebeauty's picture simplebeauty Submitted by Guest on Sat, 06/16/2012 - 18:32

ChinaJosh wrote:
You know you're a Beijinger when you've taken on the habit of putting some sort of emoticon after nearly every single chat message or SMS. Smile Wink Blum 3 I-m so happy -.- ><

yes absolutely right,and also if u are garbage picker dont care what it is they only pick what they get doesnt care about other garbage.every things are "presents" in china

Ralmuski's picture Ralmuski Submitted by Guest on Sat, 06/16/2012 - 16:36

You know you are a Beijinger when you try to close the elevator door as quickly as possible, preferably if more people might want to use it. Imagine the horror of another 3 to 4 second wait! :o

And you know you are a Beijinger when you got in the subway before anyone had the chance to get out. And feel proud of it!

See you on the dark side of the moon.

Dafne's picture Dafne Submitted by Guest on Tue, 05/22/2012 - 15:03

I'm new to Beijing but I've lived in Toronto almost my entire life and I can tell you flat out that it's people from Montreal that are hipsters. I've never heard that people from Toronto are hipster until reading this article.

Sida's picture Sida Submitted by Guest on Thu, 05/17/2012 - 11:22

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... your commute is 1 1/2 hours long.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you wipe your dog's butt but not your kid's.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you're in line at the Sanlitun Apple store.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ...you use the subway bathroom stalls that don't have doors.

admin's picture admin Submitted by Guest on Thu, 05/17/2012 - 11:05

Also, I think you are out of touch with the fact that more Beijingers these days drive cars than ride bikes, so I've modified your transport related ones:

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you drive with one hand on your horn and your super-reflex action guarantees you can let off a loud HONK mere milliseconds after the light turns green.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... a mere brushing of automotive bumpers is akin to an outright declaration of war, and you must stop and exit your vehicle immediately to have a guanxi-faceoff to shame the agressor that dared leave that little black scuffmark on that one corner of your car during the peak of Beijing's rush hour.

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... pedestrians crossing ths street in the crosswalk while the "Walk" signal is lit need to be drive back onto the side of the road by you screaming through the red light as you take a right turn. Do not show hesitation or you will lose face!

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you believe anyone that has more than two people on a pedal bike cannot possibly have the guanxi you have, so they are safe to run over with your Audi.

Books by current and former Beijinger staffers

http://astore.amazon.com/truerunmedia-20

Tony D.'s picture Tony D. Submitted by Guest on Thu, 05/17/2012 - 10:57

I feel like Beijinger is referring to laowai's, not native Beijingers.

You should try and take things with a grain of salt and not toooo seriously as this post is simply a joke, not necessarily the truth..

Juuuuuust relax a little bit!!

Tony D.

admin's picture admin Submitted by Guest on Thu, 05/17/2012 - 10:55

Quote:
You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you're disappointed that a new snack food does not come in green tea flavor.

that one's wrong ... it should be

You know you’re a Beijinger when ... you're disappointed that a new snack food does not come in red bean / green bean flavor.

Books by current and former Beijinger staffers

http://astore.amazon.com/truerunmedia-20

rikonyc's picture rikonyc Submitted by Guest on Thu, 05/17/2012 - 10:46

it's not that funny when you see this as a native beijinger, cuz most of the behaviors mentioned above are not what a real beijinger would do. And also we are not disappointed that a new snack food doesnt come in green tea flavor okay?! at least i'm not.

Validate your mobile phone number to post comments.