A Suspect Sausage Sneaks By (Almost) Undetected
Enjoying the holiday? Fireworks were pretty spectacular on Sunday. They looked better than ever after a dozen glasses of Great Leap beer. It’s a quiet time for news, unsurprisingly. Between Sunday night and Monday morning, 5,000 intrepid sanitation workers cleaned up 170 tons of fireworks debris – so well done, guys. Good job. There’s still quite a bit bunched up in the corners on my alley though, so if you could send a couple of your peeps over, that would be great.
At this time of year, it behooves us all to filter the news with a fine-toothed comb, because, though superficially it might not seem like much is going on – “Temperature to drop during festival”, “Popular comic quits New Year's gala” – the powers that be only go and sneak through a humdinger of a clanager of a story like this:
Dogs poisoned by suspect sausage
Yes. A suspect sausage. Dogs dead. A nation, well, suspicious, with most eyes on the sausage. The article in full (for contractual word count purposes):
Several dog owners at a residential compound in Daxing district suspect their dogs were poisoned Sunday, when they vomited and died after walking in the compound, the Beijing Times said. A resident, surnamed Lou, said she and the other owners saw traces of sausage in the vomit, and believe that the meat was deliberately laced with poison. Residents called police.
I hope Lou and the other residents get this cleared up soon (when that stuff freezes you'll need a jackhammer). I will admit to harbouring thoughts of doggy-cide after a few late-night yapping sessions courtesy of the neighbor's short-legged mutt, but I’d never actually go through with it. This time of year there's louder noises to deal with. Also, who's to say the sausage was even tainted? Those orange processed franks are pretty nasty shop-fresh.
Meanwhile, Beijing's Temple Fairs are raging. Seemingly one of the few places you can buy freshly-cooked food - I suffered the indignity of getting a roubing from Jinkelong supermarket this morning. (For more on open restaurants, go here). I'm off to bake some bread.
