Talking Balls: Tiger's Coming, Ronaldo's Not plus Some Rackets and Some Raquets

Tiger Woods is reported to be coming to Beijing on April 13. The golfer's Japan "Make It Matter" tour was cancelled and sponsors Nike thought that golf in China could use a boost (or that there was another burgeoning market to exploit) and rescheduled the trip to include Beijing and Shenzhen. Lock up your lapdancers.

NiuBBall has made its predictions for the CBA playoffs. Beijing scraped through in eighth spot and were given the tricky tie of top seed Xinjiang. Hopeless is the only word for the Ducks' chances against a team with one loss in the regular season.

China won three out of the five titles on offer at the Yonex All England Badminton Championships. The Men were the ones who faltered in the singles and the doubles. Team China took some criticism from the Danes who did not buy the excuses for no-show players being too injured to fly - thereby avoiding the fine for having to appear at tournaments even if you are not competing. The Badminton World Federation has set new dress codes to smarten up the sport. All female players must now wear a standard skirt or dress in ranking tournaments

If you want to play American football then there's a 5 on 5 game for you. The 55League is staring up and there is a practice on Monday at Chaoyang Sports Stadium. Get more information at www.beijingguardians.com or email beijingguardian@gmail.com.

In football news, there was a battle in Chengdu between the city's CSL team and a local side they were playing in a friendly. See the photo or a slideshow here. The CSL transfer window slammed shut and Guoan's last ditch attempt to sign Sougou of Senegal failed. Here's a full but in no way completely accurate list of the CSL signings. The CSL's first game will be Guangzhou Henda vs. Dalian Shide. Guangzhou have a massive RMB 50 million budget just for the opening ceremony - that's more than some clubs operate for the season on. Henda tried to get Shakira, Ricky Martin and Ronaldo to attend. Shakira and Ricky said a flat no but the Brazilian asked for RMB 10 million which the CSL team thought was too much. The CSL has also found its GM, Lu Jun was the man who made the cut from the 40 candidates. He will make RMB 20,000 per month before tax. We fully believe that will be the case. Guoan's first home game is on April 10.

The NBA is on Weibo, they beat Talking Balls to the punch. In Chinese basketball news, the Shenbu Fuyuan are the new champions after beating the Guangdong Jiahong in the WCBA finals.

China is struggling in the World Women's Curling Championships. They are in second place at the moment. The China Nationals will take place in Beijing next month.

Peng Shuai made it to the quarter-finals at Indian Wells where she lost to Maria Sharapova. Peng beat Li Na on the way.

Another week, another gymnastics scandal. Chinese gymnastics judge Shao Bin is being investigated for altering scores at the Asian Games. What a shock.

And finally, there's been yet another attempt at turning art into life. Someone at the Shaolin monastery has watched one soccer themed Stephen Chow film too many and brought in a football coach for the monks. Alphonse Marie Tchami Djomaha is the man to teach the under-10s and "bring China's football industry out of the mire" by combining martial arts and football.