Yeah, after crashing in a nearby alleyway, heavy duty backpack with, I skulked to the outskirts, at the crack of Dawn. Now I have done other things at the crack of Dawn, but this was the first time of mostly skulking, maybe a bit also of dejected meandering. None=the=less arrived at outskirts, stuck out my thumb, cheeseless and not having eaten since gettin on the Greyhound in St. Kitts, I donno when number of hours or days before, there I was thumb outstretched. Just then Hank Marvin and Bronson comes by in an old beatup red F150, slows down and stops. `Where ya goin son?, ya all don't look like yer from these parts, ya all got pretty pretty long hair I reckon.... we ain't got no room in the cab, ya just go lay yerself down in the back uh the truck.... doncha worry, we'll drive ya'all everywhere' Then there was a long sardonic chortle from the two uh them like i not heard before.What happened was proprietor of said location was insistent on detaining me until the local constabulary (RCMP) arrived, which is as likely as waking up yer compounds 保安 at 4 am. Thus bus driver says `look I gots a schedule to keep, i gotsa leave' , thus bus leaves, thus shop proprietor goes inside store to call RCMP again, thus I focking bolt down the street, thus I rests my weary head (without no cheese) for a few hours, thus I hitchhike the remaining distance to Prince George, where I have a job, a hotel room, and money all guaranteed, just funking get yerself here.Now let me tellya, if yer travelin on a Greyhound bus (which apparently we don't have nomores) and yer in a 7/11 bustop stop in Lloydminster at 4 am, don't go tryin to steal a cube of mozzeralla cheese, cuz you aint eaten in 3 days, cuz you will get kicked off the bus and hafta sleep in an alley way, and hafta hitchhike yer next 500 miles to Prince George.
Don't ask me how I know.
If you're in a bus stop stealing cheese, wouldn't it make more sense for them to kick you ONTO the bus? Deport your aerse, as it were. Elstwise, you might turn wraith haunting the woods out back. Dogging the steps of local school kids, "Cheezy Poooooofs! I want your Cheeeeezy Poofs!"
Wait...WAIT! I saw this in a movie! With Charles Bronson and Lee Marvin. In the Yukon circa 1920's the movie is set. Bronson runs afoul of the law somehow. I think he was in a cheese shop and the owner, John Cleese, kept fekking with him, "No no Jarlsberg, no Winslydale, no Provolone. Riccota? Yes---oh dear, the cat's been at it." So naturally Bronson bronsons him with his gat. Then Mountie Lee Marvin chases Bronson all across the Yukon south across the Tryolean Alps into Wisconsin, land of cheddar and (I dunno, cream cheese?)
You still ain't told us. Was there cheese in Prince George?
None-the-less, I did live to tell the tail, tho' rather not relate the tale, , till I arrived in PG (that's Prince George for all you non- natives), where I was put up by Carol (or maybe it Carole), co-owner of the tree-planting contractor i would be working for, 30 years my senior, fonked her brains out for the weekend, and made my way into the wilds of BC, there to plant trees.
(oh... i forgot.... initially in Prince George I could find no retail cheese available; how so ever I met two very nice fellows at an artist's cafe whom introduced me to my first experience of quiche!)