Too 250 to Know You're 38?: 10 Examples of Numerical Chinese Slang

Being called a “thirty-eight” doesn’t mean the person thinks you look like a thirty eight year old; it means he or she thinks you, as they'd say in England, are a stupid cow, and you should probably seek immediate revenge with some choice slang from my last piece such as “cao! sha bi diao si!”. Of course, only retaliate under the condition that you're confident in your hair-ripping and street fighting abilities.

RELATED: The 25 Words You Should Never Use On the Chinese Internet

To avoid situations whereby you mistake being called “thirty-eight," as a compliment, below we have listed 10 of the most common Chinese slurs that incorporate numbers. Starting from 2, we will go through 38, 88, 250, 520, 555, 886, 1314, finishing with 6666.
 

二 (er)
Origin: Unclear.
Meaning: a) silly, dumb, stupid b) used to describe someone who is airheaded, silly and slightly socially inept. Someone who doesn’t think much before doing something and act bluntly and abruptly.
Notes: Er is friendlier than er bai wu (see below) but it can still be much more insulting when it is paired with a vulgar character, such as bi (c**t). Er bi is a rough equivalent of sha bi; both mean a stupid c**t.
When to use it: a) when a friend f**ks up something through ineptitude b) when your date or loved one does something stupid but (you feel it is) endearing c) when refering to a stupid person or thing.
Sample sentence: 亲爱的你是二吗？Qin ai de ni shi er ma? Oh dear, you are so silly!
 

二逼，二缺，二傻，二货 (er bi, er que, er sha, er huo)
Origin: Derivatives of er.
Meaning: The first three, stupid c**t, dope, dickhead; the last one, a stupid but lovable person.
Notes: In order of profanity and intensity, 二逼 (er bi) > 二缺 (er que)  = 二傻 (er sha) > 二货 (er huo).
Er bi, meaning stupid c**t, can be fairly insulting, while er huo is rather friendly and might be even used between couples to show affection.
When to use it: The first three are uttered when you spot someone perceived as a dope; the last one, when your loved one does something silly
Sample sentence: 二逼真他妈没救。Er bi zhen ta ma mei jiu. There’s no cure for a stupid c**t.
 

三八 (san ba)
Origin: Unclear.
Meaning: An annoying, angry, unpleasant, gossiping, spiteful old or middle aged woman; fishwife, stupid cow.
Notes: The word rose in popularity after being widely used by Stephen Chou, considered an iconic figure in Chinese and Cantonese comedies that incorporate his unique style of humor dubbed Mo Lei Tau. Mo Lei Tau is made up of nonsensical parodies, improbable happenings, and deliberate anachronisms. We strongly suggest you not to use this word so as to avoid being destroyed by the militant feminists.
When to use it: When an extremely unpleasant and gossiping middle aged woman bothers you incessantly.
Sample sentence: 死三八，滚粗！Si san ba, gun cu! F**king stupid cow, get out!
 

二百五 (er bai wu)
Origin: According to Wikipedia, er bai wu originates from the old coin system used in ancient China – coins were grouped into diao, a thousand coins, via a piece of string. Ban diao zi, 500 coins, has been used by scholars in a show of modesty regarding their knowledge on ancient subjects and is not seen as pejorative, whereas halving the amount again to 250 most certainly is.
Meaning: Dickhead, fool, dope, similar to er, but stronger.
Notes: This word is fairly offensive and for post 80s and 90s Chinese school-aged boys, it acted a legitimate alternative to sha bi, which is strictly forbidden to be used (in the presence of meddling adults, at least).
When to use it: Use it when someone does something particularly stupid and humiliating. For example, your boyfriend, whom you have absolutely no intention to marry makes the dumbest proposal ever in front of a huge crowd. And you should say ...
Sample sentence: 你他妈是二百五吗？Ni ta ma shi er bai wu ma? Are you f**king dumb?

88 (ba ba)
Origin: The internet; phonetization of bye-bye.
Meaning: Bye-bye.
When to use it: Only in the written form, when you are stuffed by a friend’s “intimate revelations” and want to shut him/her up with some feigned sleepiness.
Sample sentence: 不好意思，我要睡了，改天再聊吧，88。Bu hao yi si, wo yao shui le, gai tian zai liao ba, 88. Sorry, I gotta sleep now. Talk to you later. 88. *opens laptop, watches porn*
 

886 (ba ba liu)
Origin: Phonetization of bye-bye la (common expression to emphasize a statement).
Meaning: Bye-bye.
When to use it: Only in written form; as a response to someone's bye-bye.
Sample usage:
You: 这个北京交友微信群里全是怪胎。88. zhe ge beijing jiao you wei xin qun li quan shi guai tai. 88. This WeChat group for finding wingmen in Beijing is giving me the serious creeps. 88.
Creepy wingman wannabe: 886~
 

520 (wu er ling)
Origin: Phonetization of “I love you”.
Meaning: I love you.
When to use it: a) denoting the “May 20” festival b) mostly used in online chatting rooms to say “I love you”; only in written form.
Notes: Not a holiday, rather a shopping bonanza, the 520 festival was constructed by evil marketers under the guise of “a day to express affection and gratitude”. On this day the er bai wu will buy his or her loved ones gifts to “express love”, usually in the form of exceedingly overpriced and highly unfashionable bags, clothes, jewelry, and chocolate, etc. All proceeds go to the devil.  
Sample sentence: 520什么的真是太傻逼了。 520 shen me de zhen shi tai sha bi le. The 520 festival is so f**king dumb.
 

555 (wu wu wu)
Origin: Phonetization of someone crying.
Meaning: I’m crying.
Notes: Guys use it with caution, in the same way you restrict yourself from ewwwing.
When to use it: only in written form, when you hear a sad story such as two good friends broke up or the beer festival got cancelled.
Sample usage:
Your friend: 啤酒节被取消了，艹！Pi jiu jie bei qu xiao le, cao! The Beer festival is canceled! WTF!
You: 555!
 

1314 (yi san yi si)
Origin: Phonetization of 一生一世，a Chinese idiom which means “(love you) for all my life”.
Meaning: (love you) for all my life.
When to use it: Only in written form, mostly in online chatting rooms.
Sample sentence: 爱你呦！1314！Ai ni you! 1314! Love you! Forever!
 

6666 ... (liu liu liu liu ...)
Origin: Online games chatting. It’s the phonetization of liu (溜), which means skillful, adept and proficient at something.
Meaning: Good job! Well done!
Notes: There isn’t a rule on how many 6s (past three) should be used, it merely depends on your mood and how fantastic the feat was.
When to use it: When someone did a very good job in a very skillful way.
Sample sentence: Leeroy Jenkins 会为你骄傲的。Leeroy Jenkins hui wei ni jiao ao de. Leeroy Jenkins would be proud. 6666666666666!
 

Editor's note: Please read through this guide carefully because language can be extraordinarily tricky. For instance, you will note that some of the slang are listed numerically yet some others are in characters – this is done on purpose, and you should follow the same pattern when using them.

Some slang can be used both in text and in oral language, er for example. However, there are others that should be only used in written forms, for example 88. Check the “when to use it” part to make sure the phrase can be used in spoken language.

Also, pay attention to the pinyin. Sometimes a number can be addressed in multiple ways. For example, for 250 you can say er bai wu, er wu ling, liang bai wu, or liang bai wu shi, etc. But the number means a dope only when it is pronounced as er bai wu.

More stories by this author here.

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